Dear LORD:
Please help us to help Jon with getting on with his life. Let us be a positive influence on this young man, who has such great potential. Be with us in this time. Let us become a loving and compassionate picture of God's love to him. Amen!
MDDL:
Your MEQ today was getting me avocado rolls from the Cheesecake factory. Those are my favorite! It was very special that you thought of me in this way. They were still hot when I picked you up! How very considerate and touching that you did that!
I believe that the situation with Jon is fraught with risk, but also pregnant with great opportunity. Our relationship is now strong enough, that the LORD obviously trusts us to handle this appropriately.
The way we could blow this is of course to treat him like a child again, and to become hyper controlling, meddling, opinionated, and so forth parents. Let us avoid this fate.
The way we could absolutely be a huge positive influence on Jon is to trust him to make the right choices (subject to evidence to the contrary of course), and to assume quietly (while soaking the situation in prayer) that he will not abuse that trust. I pray to God that he does not. If Jon repeats the mistakes his brother made we could lose him for a long, long time, as we have apparently lost Sam.
I think this is the crucible for Jon. He is disgusted with himself right now. He wants to clean up his act and get on with his life in a more productive manner. We can definitely help him with that. In the process, we can influence him to give God another look, and perhaps hook him up with some Christians who do not suck as much as the others he has know up until now. Who knows what God may do?
The way I feel about this is hopeful and excited. I am happy that Jon is moving home actually. Although I resisted it at first, I think it will be a good time for us. He is a really cute kid in many respect. He is certainly charming and funny. Jeanae loves him dearly and gets along with him very well. They are a lot of fun to watch interact. It may be the best time we have ever spent with our son. And it may be over too soon, before we even know it.
I feel hopeful in the same manner I felt hopeful about you when I spoke to you on the phone from Baton Rouge. It was like that. I even said to Jeanae on that occasion "This may be it. This may be the time she comes around." I feel that way about Jon. He has seen what the wages of sin are. He has witnessed it in his brother and Kate. He is disgusted. That's are really, really hopeful sign.
Let us continue to pray fervently and frequently for our son. He needs us now. Let us remain one in our relationship in the areas of what we will and will not tolerate. (No alcohol or drugs in our house, ever. No smoking in the house either. And no girls in the house without an adult present. I want no illicit activity in this house at all.) For now, I will simply assume that Jon will be smart and use common sense. I think he will. I will be vigilant for signs to the contrary. I would like for us to remain one in this attitude of trust and vigilence.
Aside from that, I am hopeful. Who knows what God may do through us and our daughter in the life of this precious one?
Love,
Me
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
How do you feel that our new arrangement for handling the children is working out? DYFF?
Dear LORD:
Be with Ruth and me as we forge a new relationship with our children. Help us to remain the example of godly parents and a godly married couple to our children. Keep our testimony to them sincere and unadulterated by the world. Help us to walk the line between being relevant and being worldly. Give us a way to show them the way. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was taking care of the HP printer. You did so very cheerfully, although that item was on my plate, and I had not gotten it done. You were awesome! I appreciate everything you do for me and our family!
The way I feel about our new arrangement for handling the children is great! I am functioning as the children's father for the first time in a long time, maybe ever.
Samuel was amazing tonight. When presented with the opportunity for me to bail him out of his ticket situation he refused. He took responsibility for that ticket although he did not have a handle on how to solve it at that point. He is refusing to rely on my good graces too much. I regard this as a very positive thing for Sam. He could become a dependent child, and I want him to avoid that, and to become fully independent. He is aware that he is exposed in the situation with his license right now, and he is working very hard to become able to handle that on his own.
I am willing to help Sam out but welcome the fact that he wants to do this without me. I pray (please LORD!) that he will be successful in that.
In terms of Jon, he has taken responsibility for looking for his car. He relied up on me heavily last week and earlier this week to do that. When I talked to him about how much his payment was going to be, he seemed to realize that he was going to have to work on this. He came up with a very reasonable car for himself tonight. I was very proud of him as well.
Jeanae is the the current problem child. She has regressed a bit in the area of her dress. When she came home from school on Monday she looked like a call girl. She had on a pair of stacked high-heel boots, a very tight pair of pants, and a very stylish top. I do not know what she looked like today, but she is definitely not being the New Modest Jeanae she was a few months ago. I think a bit of rebellion against the rules of CCS is going on. She wants to push her limits, clearly. She needs to take the yoke, do it as unto the LORD, and stop kicking against the goads. I will talk to her on this issue when I get back tomorrow.
I love all of our children very, very much. I want to be the father, priest, and spiritual leader that they need. I am a broken, sinful man, but I have Y'Shua living inside me. Hallelujah! I can do all things through the Messiah who strengthens me!
So, again, the way I feel about the kids right now is great. I know we face some challenges. But I am ready to handle them, now more fully than ever because I have you with me. I love you and I know that I rest in your love, and the love of Y'Shua through you. I feel equal to the task. I feel adequate in the Messiah. He is my strength. I am filled with confidence, assurance, and peace that He can do it all!
Love,
Me
Be with Ruth and me as we forge a new relationship with our children. Help us to remain the example of godly parents and a godly married couple to our children. Keep our testimony to them sincere and unadulterated by the world. Help us to walk the line between being relevant and being worldly. Give us a way to show them the way. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was taking care of the HP printer. You did so very cheerfully, although that item was on my plate, and I had not gotten it done. You were awesome! I appreciate everything you do for me and our family!
The way I feel about our new arrangement for handling the children is great! I am functioning as the children's father for the first time in a long time, maybe ever.
Samuel was amazing tonight. When presented with the opportunity for me to bail him out of his ticket situation he refused. He took responsibility for that ticket although he did not have a handle on how to solve it at that point. He is refusing to rely on my good graces too much. I regard this as a very positive thing for Sam. He could become a dependent child, and I want him to avoid that, and to become fully independent. He is aware that he is exposed in the situation with his license right now, and he is working very hard to become able to handle that on his own.
I am willing to help Sam out but welcome the fact that he wants to do this without me. I pray (please LORD!) that he will be successful in that.
In terms of Jon, he has taken responsibility for looking for his car. He relied up on me heavily last week and earlier this week to do that. When I talked to him about how much his payment was going to be, he seemed to realize that he was going to have to work on this. He came up with a very reasonable car for himself tonight. I was very proud of him as well.
Jeanae is the the current problem child. She has regressed a bit in the area of her dress. When she came home from school on Monday she looked like a call girl. She had on a pair of stacked high-heel boots, a very tight pair of pants, and a very stylish top. I do not know what she looked like today, but she is definitely not being the New Modest Jeanae she was a few months ago. I think a bit of rebellion against the rules of CCS is going on. She wants to push her limits, clearly. She needs to take the yoke, do it as unto the LORD, and stop kicking against the goads. I will talk to her on this issue when I get back tomorrow.
I love all of our children very, very much. I want to be the father, priest, and spiritual leader that they need. I am a broken, sinful man, but I have Y'Shua living inside me. Hallelujah! I can do all things through the Messiah who strengthens me!
So, again, the way I feel about the kids right now is great. I know we face some challenges. But I am ready to handle them, now more fully than ever because I have you with me. I love you and I know that I rest in your love, and the love of Y'Shua through you. I feel equal to the task. I feel adequate in the Messiah. He is my strength. I am filled with confidence, assurance, and peace that He can do it all!
Love,
Me
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
How do I feel about us being apart for a couple of days? DYFF?
Dear LORD:
Be with Ruth and me as I go on this business trip. Help us to remain as connected and intimate as always. Help me not to be depressed and lonely without her. I have gotten sooooo attached to her! Help Ruth and Jeanae build their relationship further together in my absence.
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was being very fetching in the nude in the bathroom when I came in there from helping Jeanae with her homework. Wonderful!
The way I feel about being in Atlanta is depressed and lonely. Also empty. I really hate traveling without you. Can we arrange that I do not have to do this anymore?
I think having a traveling job would be fun if you could go with me on all, or at least nearly all, of my trips. I would not want to be gone 80% of the time even then. A week or two a month is plenty. I would want it to be heavy on international travel. That way we could join the 1 mile club on lots of international flights. And you would get to see lots of interesting places. I have had the chance to do that, but you have not had as much of a chance as I have. I think it would be fun for us to be together in Europe, Asia, South America and so forth, to see the way other people live and appreciate their culture. It really gives you a unique perspective.
I would love that! Wow! That would be really cool. When I think about you and I traveling together and having that experience together, get really excited.
I just do not want to travel without you though. A couple of days is my limit for sure. I think I told you I pushed back on a trip next month. I did not want to go there. It would have been three more days. In Hopkinton no less. What a desert! Nothing there to do except eat and sit in your hotel room! Blah!
So I am tending to become very scratchy when my manager tells me to get on a plane and go somewhere without you for an extended period. Now Sunil is talking about having the Q1 planning meeting in Bangalore. Fortunately, it will probably not happen for budget reasons. It would cost a fortune for us to get the team over there. Although it probably would be a good idea. However, I would certainly not want to go there without you. It would be for a couple of weeks at least. You can't really travel to India for less than that. It is another 20 hour around-the-world trip. You can literally go home in either direction and it take exactly the same amount of time. Either via Frankfurt going East or via Hong Kong going West. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. I would take 2 days just getting there.
If you wanted to go, I would love to try to do it. It would be somewhat expensive. But we could spend at least one night in each location on the outbound and return trips. I really like to spend 24 hours in Frankfurt. It is a really nice town.
So, my bottom line is that I miss you terribly. I love you dearly. And I want to be with you. When you described your evening to me today, that sounded sooooo good to me! I was jealous! I wanted to do that instead of what I am doing.
Oh well.
I feels hauntingly familiar. Just like it used to feel when I was on a business trip before. I would get out to some anonymous location where no one knows me. Where I get no hugs. And there I would be. Alone and lonely. Missing you. If anything I miss you more now. Then our relationship was way, way more stressful than it is now. I just want to be with you, hold you, kiss you, make sweet, sweet love to you, and hang out with you, cuddle with you. You get the idea. I am crazy about you!
Love,
Me
Be with Ruth and me as I go on this business trip. Help us to remain as connected and intimate as always. Help me not to be depressed and lonely without her. I have gotten sooooo attached to her! Help Ruth and Jeanae build their relationship further together in my absence.
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was being very fetching in the nude in the bathroom when I came in there from helping Jeanae with her homework. Wonderful!
The way I feel about being in Atlanta is depressed and lonely. Also empty. I really hate traveling without you. Can we arrange that I do not have to do this anymore?
I think having a traveling job would be fun if you could go with me on all, or at least nearly all, of my trips. I would not want to be gone 80% of the time even then. A week or two a month is plenty. I would want it to be heavy on international travel. That way we could join the 1 mile club on lots of international flights. And you would get to see lots of interesting places. I have had the chance to do that, but you have not had as much of a chance as I have. I think it would be fun for us to be together in Europe, Asia, South America and so forth, to see the way other people live and appreciate their culture. It really gives you a unique perspective.
I would love that! Wow! That would be really cool. When I think about you and I traveling together and having that experience together, get really excited.
I just do not want to travel without you though. A couple of days is my limit for sure. I think I told you I pushed back on a trip next month. I did not want to go there. It would have been three more days. In Hopkinton no less. What a desert! Nothing there to do except eat and sit in your hotel room! Blah!
So I am tending to become very scratchy when my manager tells me to get on a plane and go somewhere without you for an extended period. Now Sunil is talking about having the Q1 planning meeting in Bangalore. Fortunately, it will probably not happen for budget reasons. It would cost a fortune for us to get the team over there. Although it probably would be a good idea. However, I would certainly not want to go there without you. It would be for a couple of weeks at least. You can't really travel to India for less than that. It is another 20 hour around-the-world trip. You can literally go home in either direction and it take exactly the same amount of time. Either via Frankfurt going East or via Hong Kong going West. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. I would take 2 days just getting there.
If you wanted to go, I would love to try to do it. It would be somewhat expensive. But we could spend at least one night in each location on the outbound and return trips. I really like to spend 24 hours in Frankfurt. It is a really nice town.
So, my bottom line is that I miss you terribly. I love you dearly. And I want to be with you. When you described your evening to me today, that sounded sooooo good to me! I was jealous! I wanted to do that instead of what I am doing.
Oh well.
I feels hauntingly familiar. Just like it used to feel when I was on a business trip before. I would get out to some anonymous location where no one knows me. Where I get no hugs. And there I would be. Alone and lonely. Missing you. If anything I miss you more now. Then our relationship was way, way more stressful than it is now. I just want to be with you, hold you, kiss you, make sweet, sweet love to you, and hang out with you, cuddle with you. You get the idea. I am crazy about you!
Love,
Me
Sunday, November 25, 2007
How do I feel about our involvement in Vintage 21?
Dear LORD:
Thank you for your wisdom and direction to Vintage 21. Build us fully into the body there. Help us to become more connected. Show us how to introduce Retrouvaille to that community. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was being cuddly in the meeting at Vintage 21. It was wonderful being in the meeting with you. I loved it very much.
My feelings about Vintage 21 are various. On the one hand, I am very hopeful and pumped about Vintage 21. There were many things about the meeting today that I thought were very wonderful. I think it is great for example that Jeanae loves it there. I very much enjoyed our home meeting last Monday night and am looking forward to the meeting tomorrow night very much as well. I would also like to pursue the Owners night which is Tuesday, if you are interested. Let me know if you think I am going too fast. I tend to do that sometimes.
On the other hand, I am a bit concerned that we have yet to get to know any of the members outside of the context of a formal meeting. I was trolling for a lunch date today, but that did not happen. The only folks we knew there today were Collin and Holly, and he turned me down flat for lunch. (He said they had a neighbor that they were ministering to.)
I want to be involved in a loving community of Christians who are followers and lovers of Y'Shua. That requires more connection than just a meeting on Sunday and a home meeting once a week. I want to be involved in their lives in a much more tangible and intimate way than just that. Maybe that will begin to happen soon.
I do like the culture though. The music today was superb. I thought Tyler's message was also excellent. It is pretty close to what I am looking for. I got another positive reassurance from the LORD today when I spoke to Tyler and asked him if he knew about ERM. He said yes, he has read several of his books, and has even had lunch with him. While he did say he has some areas of disagreement with ERM, they are trivial, and for the most part he is on board with ERM in the main thrust of his ministry. Also, when I said that what he has come up with was very similar to Mosaic in LA, he smiled broadly, and said he regarded that as high compliment. This means that the LORD has actually led us to a church very similar to Mosaic, which is exactly what I have been praying for.
So, in the main, I am pumped, excited and hopeful. At the same time, I am impatient. The pumped and excited is way, way stronger than the impatient is. It is kind of like the feeling you get when you go to a really great football game, and you watch the last touchdown be scored by your team to win the game. You are totally pumped! That's how I feel. Very excited! It am really looking forward to engaging with God's children again for the first time in many years.
Love,
Me
Thank you for your wisdom and direction to Vintage 21. Build us fully into the body there. Help us to become more connected. Show us how to introduce Retrouvaille to that community. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was being cuddly in the meeting at Vintage 21. It was wonderful being in the meeting with you. I loved it very much.
My feelings about Vintage 21 are various. On the one hand, I am very hopeful and pumped about Vintage 21. There were many things about the meeting today that I thought were very wonderful. I think it is great for example that Jeanae loves it there. I very much enjoyed our home meeting last Monday night and am looking forward to the meeting tomorrow night very much as well. I would also like to pursue the Owners night which is Tuesday, if you are interested. Let me know if you think I am going too fast. I tend to do that sometimes.
On the other hand, I am a bit concerned that we have yet to get to know any of the members outside of the context of a formal meeting. I was trolling for a lunch date today, but that did not happen. The only folks we knew there today were Collin and Holly, and he turned me down flat for lunch. (He said they had a neighbor that they were ministering to.)
I want to be involved in a loving community of Christians who are followers and lovers of Y'Shua. That requires more connection than just a meeting on Sunday and a home meeting once a week. I want to be involved in their lives in a much more tangible and intimate way than just that. Maybe that will begin to happen soon.
I do like the culture though. The music today was superb. I thought Tyler's message was also excellent. It is pretty close to what I am looking for. I got another positive reassurance from the LORD today when I spoke to Tyler and asked him if he knew about ERM. He said yes, he has read several of his books, and has even had lunch with him. While he did say he has some areas of disagreement with ERM, they are trivial, and for the most part he is on board with ERM in the main thrust of his ministry. Also, when I said that what he has come up with was very similar to Mosaic in LA, he smiled broadly, and said he regarded that as high compliment. This means that the LORD has actually led us to a church very similar to Mosaic, which is exactly what I have been praying for.
So, in the main, I am pumped, excited and hopeful. At the same time, I am impatient. The pumped and excited is way, way stronger than the impatient is. It is kind of like the feeling you get when you go to a really great football game, and you watch the last touchdown be scored by your team to win the game. You are totally pumped! That's how I feel. Very excited! It am really looking forward to engaging with God's children again for the first time in many years.
Love,
Me
Friday, November 23, 2007
Is there anything that I could do to make your life easier and more pleasant? HDIFAMA?
Dear LORD:
Help me to know how to love Ruth fully and completely, with my whole being, as she deserves to be loved. Thanks so much for her. She is a precious gift that I treasure. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was listening to me chatter away without ever changing the subject or wavering in your attention to me. It was wonderful just talking to you. I like hanging out with you, just being together and chillin'. Great fun!
You are doing so many things to make my life easier and more pleasant. It is hard for me to know what else to ask for. I guess I would say more of the same: Be responsive to me sexually is a huge factor. You have completely revolutionized my life in the area of sex. I cannot tell you how fundamentally this has changed my heart. You are amazing to me.
Honestly, it is difficult. Let's see. Hmmmm.
OK, I've got one. Go to the gym with me. Yeah, that would be one.
Let's make a date to go check out the new gym. As we figured out today, my body really likes strenuous exercise. And to tell you the truth, it's not a lot of fun. Like I've told you before, my working out on an exercise machine for 30 minutes is slightly more fun than getting my teeth drilled. It's the effect on my body that I am going for. It makes my whole body seem to work better and be happier if I do this fairly regularly. I feel like it is a married single activity though. That's why I want to try to sneak it in at a time when you are working or such things. If I could ever get you to go with me on a regular basis, that would be soooooooo great!
I really don't want to do it by myself honestly. Maybe that's unrealistic, but that would be a secret wish.
I guess ditto on riding the bike. I am happy and contented when I am riding the bike. It is a gentle, non stressful form of exercise, involving minimal pounding. You get to see cool stuff. You have a couple of really great bikes. So if we could get that going it would be great as well.
Basically, I want to combine a couple of things I really like, i.e. biking and working out (not that that is much fun honestly, but it feels really good when I am done) with someone I really love, i.e. you, my beautiful and lovely wife.
I promise to not be demanding about this, though. If you could try to be involved, then great. But I will not make the mistake of becoming a nudge ever again. (Or if I do, just remind me and I will apologize immediately!)
How I feel about this is a bit sheepish to tell you this, because you have made so many huge changes for me in the area of our marriage, communications and sex life. So again, if you do not do these things please understand that I will totally understand and appreciate what you have done. But you asked, so there you have it.
It's kind of like when you are put in a position to receive an award of something like that. You feel a bit sheepish, at least I do. Especially if it is in front of a whole bunch of people.
Or maybe you have been asked to share something painfully personal about yourself to a group of relative strangers. So you feel kind of sheepish.
A little bashful in other words.
Not a huge feeling. Maybe a 3. Hoping you will receive this. Not sure you will. But loving you no matter what.
I love you with an undying love which knows no bounds or limits and is grounded in the love of Y'shua!
Love,
Me
Help me to know how to love Ruth fully and completely, with my whole being, as she deserves to be loved. Thanks so much for her. She is a precious gift that I treasure. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was listening to me chatter away without ever changing the subject or wavering in your attention to me. It was wonderful just talking to you. I like hanging out with you, just being together and chillin'. Great fun!
You are doing so many things to make my life easier and more pleasant. It is hard for me to know what else to ask for. I guess I would say more of the same: Be responsive to me sexually is a huge factor. You have completely revolutionized my life in the area of sex. I cannot tell you how fundamentally this has changed my heart. You are amazing to me.
Honestly, it is difficult. Let's see. Hmmmm.
OK, I've got one. Go to the gym with me. Yeah, that would be one.
Let's make a date to go check out the new gym. As we figured out today, my body really likes strenuous exercise. And to tell you the truth, it's not a lot of fun. Like I've told you before, my working out on an exercise machine for 30 minutes is slightly more fun than getting my teeth drilled. It's the effect on my body that I am going for. It makes my whole body seem to work better and be happier if I do this fairly regularly. I feel like it is a married single activity though. That's why I want to try to sneak it in at a time when you are working or such things. If I could ever get you to go with me on a regular basis, that would be soooooooo great!
I really don't want to do it by myself honestly. Maybe that's unrealistic, but that would be a secret wish.
I guess ditto on riding the bike. I am happy and contented when I am riding the bike. It is a gentle, non stressful form of exercise, involving minimal pounding. You get to see cool stuff. You have a couple of really great bikes. So if we could get that going it would be great as well.
Basically, I want to combine a couple of things I really like, i.e. biking and working out (not that that is much fun honestly, but it feels really good when I am done) with someone I really love, i.e. you, my beautiful and lovely wife.
I promise to not be demanding about this, though. If you could try to be involved, then great. But I will not make the mistake of becoming a nudge ever again. (Or if I do, just remind me and I will apologize immediately!)
How I feel about this is a bit sheepish to tell you this, because you have made so many huge changes for me in the area of our marriage, communications and sex life. So again, if you do not do these things please understand that I will totally understand and appreciate what you have done. But you asked, so there you have it.
It's kind of like when you are put in a position to receive an award of something like that. You feel a bit sheepish, at least I do. Especially if it is in front of a whole bunch of people.
Or maybe you have been asked to share something painfully personal about yourself to a group of relative strangers. So you feel kind of sheepish.
A little bashful in other words.
Not a huge feeling. Maybe a 3. Hoping you will receive this. Not sure you will. But loving you no matter what.
I love you with an undying love which knows no bounds or limits and is grounded in the love of Y'shua!
Love,
Me
Thursday, November 22, 2007
How did you feel about Thanksgiving with our family? HDIFAMA?
Dear LORD:
Thank you so much for the wonderful day with our family. I enjoyed it tremendously.
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was be loving way you accepted my correction regarding the gravy. I can remember a time when that level of conflict would have been a major deal in our relationship. No longer. You took that with grace and poise. You got what you wanted. I got what I wanted. No big hassle involved either. Yay! Do you have any idea how big a difference that is in you?
The way I felt during our Thanksgiving was happy. I was thrilled that our sons showed up. I even loved having Kate around. The food was excellent. There were no big conflicts. Everyone was relaxed and happy. Sam and Kate felt comfortable enough with us to go outside on the deck and smoke a cigarette. It was a major breakthrough in disguise as just another family holiday.
We created a tradition. We have had a Thanksgiving together as a family. That will become what we do every year from now on. You watch.
It was also wonderful to have Emily. I had a great talk with her in the kitchen. I told her that Isaiah does not deserve her. If he is not willing to shout from the rooftops that she is his love, and tell his parents to go jump in a lake if they do not like it, then he does not deserve her. Period. She agreed intellectually, but still has feelings for him. I will work on this some more.
I loved being with you as well. You were very gracious and gentle. You were relaxed and happy. You had a wonderful interaction with your son Jon here on the couch cuddling. Can you believe how relaxed and comfortable he was with us? It was so nice to see that.
I loved the whole day. It was amazing. The turkey came out great. The brine was wonderful. The turkey fryer worked great. It was smooth as silk.
So, happy. Yeah, that's it. I felt happy. Kind of like a wonderful day at the beach. Maybe a beach on the West Coast. I always liked the West Coast better because you can watch the sun go down over the ocean. Sunny and warm with a bit of a breeze. Very relaxing. Watching the waves come in. Just chillin. Happy, and serene. Not a care in the world.
If this feeling was a color it would be bright sunny yellow. The color of sunlight coming through your eyelids as you lie in the sun on the beach on a bright sunny day. Or the color of sunflowers in full bloom full of bees busily gathering nectar and pollen. The soft, silky buzzing of their wings furry in your ears.
Happy to be with you. Happy in our new house. Happy with our daughter and her friend. Happy to be with my boys. Happy to be with their friend as well.
Happy.
Love,
Me
Thank you so much for the wonderful day with our family. I enjoyed it tremendously.
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was be loving way you accepted my correction regarding the gravy. I can remember a time when that level of conflict would have been a major deal in our relationship. No longer. You took that with grace and poise. You got what you wanted. I got what I wanted. No big hassle involved either. Yay! Do you have any idea how big a difference that is in you?
The way I felt during our Thanksgiving was happy. I was thrilled that our sons showed up. I even loved having Kate around. The food was excellent. There were no big conflicts. Everyone was relaxed and happy. Sam and Kate felt comfortable enough with us to go outside on the deck and smoke a cigarette. It was a major breakthrough in disguise as just another family holiday.
We created a tradition. We have had a Thanksgiving together as a family. That will become what we do every year from now on. You watch.
It was also wonderful to have Emily. I had a great talk with her in the kitchen. I told her that Isaiah does not deserve her. If he is not willing to shout from the rooftops that she is his love, and tell his parents to go jump in a lake if they do not like it, then he does not deserve her. Period. She agreed intellectually, but still has feelings for him. I will work on this some more.
I loved being with you as well. You were very gracious and gentle. You were relaxed and happy. You had a wonderful interaction with your son Jon here on the couch cuddling. Can you believe how relaxed and comfortable he was with us? It was so nice to see that.
I loved the whole day. It was amazing. The turkey came out great. The brine was wonderful. The turkey fryer worked great. It was smooth as silk.
So, happy. Yeah, that's it. I felt happy. Kind of like a wonderful day at the beach. Maybe a beach on the West Coast. I always liked the West Coast better because you can watch the sun go down over the ocean. Sunny and warm with a bit of a breeze. Very relaxing. Watching the waves come in. Just chillin. Happy, and serene. Not a care in the world.
If this feeling was a color it would be bright sunny yellow. The color of sunlight coming through your eyelids as you lie in the sun on the beach on a bright sunny day. Or the color of sunflowers in full bloom full of bees busily gathering nectar and pollen. The soft, silky buzzing of their wings furry in your ears.
Happy to be with you. Happy in our new house. Happy with our daughter and her friend. Happy to be with my boys. Happy to be with their friend as well.
Happy.
Love,
Me
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
What do you think about being the parent of a sixteen year old girl? HDIFAMA?
Dear LORD:
Thank you for Jeanae. Help me to be the father that she needs. Be with Ruth and I as we finish raising her. Help her to become the woman that I see inside her. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was the loving way that you supported Jeanae when she had her nose pierced. She is really letting you back into her life!
I think that being Jeanae's father is wonderful. It is also stressful, annoying and difficult at times. I am very glad that I have you back to help me share the burden. She needs you at least as much as she needs me.
As she pointed out tonight, she is just like you. When we were separated, everyday I was with Jeanae, I missed you more, because I saw your beauty, grace and charm in her. She was your image. I never stopped loving you because I still loved her. This is one reason why I was so ready to get back together with you. I continued to be with you through her.
She is very complicated. Very, very complicated. I actually think she may even be more complicated than you at this point. If that is possible. Certainly, you have become less difficult and complicated recently. And she has become more so, so I think she does exceed you at this point.
She is also challenging. She can be the classic surly teenager, very disrespectful and impatient with authority. Mine included. She has said more than once that she simply wants to be out of school so she can start life. She thinks she is ready to be launched into the world. But she is wrong. She still needs a couple more years of being our child still.
Of the three children, she is the closest to me, and the one of whom I am the most proud. A comparative statement, but still true. She has many admirable qualities. Not the least of which is her spiritual side. She is very strong in the LORD and I think that will last the rest of her life, unless I misjudge her.
I will miss her when she is gone. I pray that we live close to her and her family so that we can enjoy her as the years go by.
I certainly treasure these years. They will be gone far too quickly. As much fun as having babies was, this is also very dear and very special to me.
The way I feel is privileged. It is a great privilege to be Jeanae's father. As well as to be your husband. This time of my life I would not trade for the world. It is a gift. It feels like I have been given a great honor, a medal or such. Or a high office. Something like that. Something which others aspire to, but seldom achieve. I have become the loving father of a happy, well adjusted sixteen year old girl. In this day and age, that is very, very rare.
Love,
Me
Thank you for Jeanae. Help me to be the father that she needs. Be with Ruth and I as we finish raising her. Help her to become the woman that I see inside her. Amen!
Dearest Ruth:
Your MEQ today was the loving way that you supported Jeanae when she had her nose pierced. She is really letting you back into her life!
I think that being Jeanae's father is wonderful. It is also stressful, annoying and difficult at times. I am very glad that I have you back to help me share the burden. She needs you at least as much as she needs me.
As she pointed out tonight, she is just like you. When we were separated, everyday I was with Jeanae, I missed you more, because I saw your beauty, grace and charm in her. She was your image. I never stopped loving you because I still loved her. This is one reason why I was so ready to get back together with you. I continued to be with you through her.
She is very complicated. Very, very complicated. I actually think she may even be more complicated than you at this point. If that is possible. Certainly, you have become less difficult and complicated recently. And she has become more so, so I think she does exceed you at this point.
She is also challenging. She can be the classic surly teenager, very disrespectful and impatient with authority. Mine included. She has said more than once that she simply wants to be out of school so she can start life. She thinks she is ready to be launched into the world. But she is wrong. She still needs a couple more years of being our child still.
Of the three children, she is the closest to me, and the one of whom I am the most proud. A comparative statement, but still true. She has many admirable qualities. Not the least of which is her spiritual side. She is very strong in the LORD and I think that will last the rest of her life, unless I misjudge her.
I will miss her when she is gone. I pray that we live close to her and her family so that we can enjoy her as the years go by.
I certainly treasure these years. They will be gone far too quickly. As much fun as having babies was, this is also very dear and very special to me.
The way I feel is privileged. It is a great privilege to be Jeanae's father. As well as to be your husband. This time of my life I would not trade for the world. It is a gift. It feels like I have been given a great honor, a medal or such. Or a high office. Something like that. Something which others aspire to, but seldom achieve. I have become the loving father of a happy, well adjusted sixteen year old girl. In this day and age, that is very, very rare.
Love,
Me
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